Two weeks to go

Well we have two weeks to go before the big day.  Less than actually.  We’re so excited but also ready to just be married and enjoying a normal life.  I’m hoping to start blogging again more regularly after that.  I’ll actually have free time again that I can dedicate to anything I choose (and even a little expendable income that will no longer be going to wedding plans and honeymoon budgets). 

I’m just so excited.  I can’t believe I get to marry HIM. 

Big news!

I’m getting married.  It’s still not registering when I say it.  I just can’t believe that my life is working out like this.  What on earth did I do to deserve marrying the guy of my dreams?  Sure, there’s stress, and some things don’t work out the way I’d hoped, but nothing could have prepared me for this blessing. 

We’re getting married with views of the mountains in front of us and our families behind us.  We’re going to have a commitment ceremony later in front of our friends, because they matter too. 

 I’ve been a nervous wreck worrying about the dress (evidently most people have more than 5 months of wedding planning, and just ordering a dress takes 4 months!) and worrying about the logistics of it all.  Of course I want it to be perfect.  Of course I want to look beautiful in the perfect dress.  Things like that can make me crazy.  We decided yesterday, that it WON’T be perfect.  We’ll have Mother Nature to contend with, as well as one of the busiest places and months the Smokies have.  But you know what?  He is.  And we are.  And that is all that matters!

My life was changed by a train

My life was changed by a train, on a particularly peculiar Monday, immediately following Thanksgiving weekend.  I have every reason to be especially thankful this year.  And I am. 

There’s music in my memories…

He told me something very wonderful.  I cried.  I knew at that moment, it would be one of the happiest moments of my life.  And then I noticed the song on the radio.  Now, I love Rod Stewart’s Maggie May as much as the next person, but I can honestly say, when I realized it would forever be aural wallpaper during one of my greatest memories, I was a bit disappointed.  I guess its funny now. (And to be honest, I immediately knew I would write this post, but when I sat down to write it, for a brief moment, I couldn’t remember if it was Maggie May or Tonight’s the Night, so how bad could it be?)

 It could be worse.  It could have “a-zig-a-zig-ahhhh” in it!

Does everyone remember what song was playing in most of their memories? 

Gulp!

His family (and I mean mother, father, brother, sister-in-law, niece, and nephew) will be in Chattanooga this weekend and will meet my dad for the first time.  Is it wrong to be nervous?  Its just so rare that this many people that are SO important to me will be meeting. 

Picture post

Mushy-ness - Code Red

This time last year, I had an INSANE crush on this guy.  I’ve known him for years.  We were friends of friends, before we actually became friends, and once I got to know him, I sincerely thought he was “perfect” for me.  We had tons in common, always had interesting conversations, enough about us was different to contribute differing points of view on certain topics.

He wasn’t exactly available, though.  Of course, I never mentioned my crush, I just acted as though friendship was all I wanted anyway.  Well, of course in the mean time, as those of you that read here often, know, I fell in actual, real life, head over heals, end of the world, maddening, smitten love with someone.

I ran into him last weekend and he’s completely available now.  We had a couple of beers, and after a bit of liquid courage, I confessed that I had had a crush on him.  As it turns out, he had the same crush.  Funny, huh?  Two ships that passed in the night, I suppose.  It was a weird moment for me, thinking of how different things are now, and how they might’ve turned out if things had gone a little bit differently.

And then B walked in and I lit up like a firecracker.  I can’t put in words the butterflies, warm fuzzies, happy thoughts, sheer giddyness I feel about him.  There’s nothing and no one that could pull me away from him or any risk I’d take because there’s nothing like this.  Not for me.

Train update

He was a bartender at the ThInQ Tank, and I was a “manager” (don’t judge, please, I had nothing to do with all THAT!). One night he came to my apartment after work. We were drunk and both, to this day, argue about whether or not we made out. (Whether or not we did, we both decided it was not somewhere we needed to go.) For about 5 years, every time we saw each other we hugged but quickly moved on. Last summer one of my best friends walked up to me at Sundown and said, “Wanna see a picture of the guy I’m gonna marry?” I took one look and said, “No you aren’t, that’s B.” They dated a month or so, and he dated another friend after that. (He wasn’t really known for being a good boyfriend!)

I saw him the night before I left for Vegoose at Manhattan’s and tried my best, in my drunken stupor, to hit on him. I was with a guy friend, so of course he thought I was with him. I thought he was blowing me off. I saw him the next week at Nama, and he was excited to see me, but being a brat, I ignored him for spite.

The next Monday, I specifically didn’t want to go to Grill with my friends. I don’t (didn’t) know why. I decided to just go home. (Which isn’t at all like me). When I got to the Old City, there was a train stuck on the tracks. I look to my right and saw Barleys and immediately thought of $2 pints. I walked in with the paper to do the crossword and a book so I wouldn’t look like a lonely loser. As soon as I sat down, he walked in and asked if he could join me. We drank, laughed, and played hangman on napkins for about 4 hours. We talked about music. I asked if he wanted to come to my house and listen to records. He did. We slow danced to the Jayhawks “All the Right Reasons” and he played my guitar for hours.

He left his cell phone at my house and I met him the next night (again at Barleys) to give it to him. He brought me a book. I knew at that moment I was done.

Miss Manners

I was raised with what I believed to be really good manners. My mom insisted on it. I was the only 6 year old showing up to a slumber party with a 2-liter bottle of Coke because “you just can’t show up empty handed”. I was taught that a guy opens a door for you, out of respect, but I should hold the door for my elders as well as people entering a building after me. Just because you should. If I were to be lucky enough to find a guy that helps me on or off with my coat (and I am), then I should also grant him the same respect in the opportune moment. I’m pretty confident with my forks, salad and dinner, and I always “Yes ma’am, no ma’am,” “Yes sir, no sir,” and “Thank you” and “You’re welcome”.

All that being said, my boyfriend’s parents (and him, obviously) have very, what I would call, formal manners.  They’ve got manners I’ve never even heard of, like the one suggesting you leave a fork in the floor of a restaurant if you’ve dropped it.  That’s just crazy.  My thirty-one year old boyfriend asked his mother if he could be excused from the table.  Wow.

I’ve found myself very self-conscious and self-doubting in these situations.  Heck, when we last had a meal with his father, I momentarily blanked on which fork was my salad fork!  (Why you would need a huge fork for your salad, I don’t know, but still, I wasn’t sure.)  Of course, one factor is that I so want them to like me, and they do.  But I want them to keep liking me.  Also of course, they are wonderful people and wouldn’t stop liking me if I ate my salad with the bread knife.  Even so, its something that is interesting about his family.

I remember when we first started dating, being shocked as we sat down to dinner having him help me off with my coat and pull out my chair.  Guys just don’t do that anymore, not many, at least.  And even fewer still continue to do it well into a relationship, which he still does.  On one of those first dates, being impressed by his perfect manners, I said, “Where in the world did you come from?”

Well, now I know.

Reservations

How can I convince you it’s me I don’t like
When I’ve always been distant
and I’ve always told lies for love

I’m bound by these choices so hard to make
I’m bound by the feeling so easy to fake
None of this is real enough to take me from you

Oh I’ve got reservations
about so many things
but not about you

I know this isn’t what you were wanting me to say
How can I get closer and be further away
From the truth that proves it’s beautiful to lie

I’ve got reservations
about so many things
but not about you
I’ve reservations
about so many things
but not about you
not about you
not about you
not about you
it’s not about you

Long Time, No Post

Well I haven’t posted in a while. I was away from a computer for several days (which is good). We went over to Sapphire, NC for the weekend. Well actually, Sapphire was just our home-base. B’s parents are building a house in Seneca, SC so we went to see their lot and take a boat ride. His brother is also building, but in Anderson, SC, so we went there too to see their future home site. Both are really nice lots and I’m sure will soon have awesome homes on them. I was a bit envious after looking over everyone’s building plans. It would be nice to design a house from the ground up as his parents have. His brother is building a custom home, but they are using pre-designed plans and are tweaking them to their specifications. His parents literally designed the entire house. How fun!

After we left Anderson, we went over to Greenville. I hadn’t been before, but loved it. There’s a river and a park that is smack-dab in the center of the city! It was beautiful and so many people were out enjoying it. Kids were splashing around, dogs were playing, ducks were swimming and playing. It was just beautiful. I just stood there on this suspension bridge for about 20 minutes just staring at it all. So peaceful. We were just there to walk around for a little while and then to have dinner, but I really would LOVE to go back. With B’s entire family moving to the area, I’m guessing we’ll have plenty of time to see more of Greenville!

Wrong Page

Do you ever just feel like you’re on the “wrong page” with your significant other? Obviously this happens sometimes, but it really doesn’t happen all that often with us. This weekend, though, that seemed to be the case. It isn’t a big deal, it was just a matter of one of us wanting to go out with friends and have a good time, and the other wanting to stay home and spend some quality alone time, and then by the end of the weekend the roles were reversed. As I said, its not a big deal, but I sure am glad its not common!

Sunsphere Re-opens

So they are finally re-opening the Sunsphere to the public. I think its a great idea and something that should have been done a long time ago. Its been hard to explain why we have this odd structure right in the center of downtown and you couldn’t even go in it to enjoy the view.

For me, its a little bittersweet, though. See, until Monday, I worked for the guy who’s company has control of the Sunsphere. I had promised B. that I would take him up in it. He’s been here in Knoxville for nine years and it was something he had wanted to do for about nine years! I got permission from my boss and had all but made the appropriate arrangements to take him up. The last conversation I had with my boss about it, he insisted it was really hot up there so we decided to wait. Maybe the old boss man didn’t want me to go up, I don’t know. He never acted like it. He acted like it was no big deal for me to go. But I had NO idea they were re-opening it so soon.

So I’m glad it open, I really am. I just wish I had acted a little sooner because seeing my boyfriend’s friends bragging about going up in it before he had was such a bummer! (Especially the one that just moved here a couple of years ago!)

Sights from ‘Roo

Luckiest girl in the world.